Ok let's kick this shit into high gear by kicking in the balls something that sorely needs a cock-punching:  Apple, and all the slaver ing god damned fucking retard fanboys that follow Apple around.  Click below for why. 

Once upon a time, a bunch of geeks and nerds invented the home computer.  You had your Commie 64, you had your Atari, and, of course, you had your god damned Apple 2.  I refuse to use the stupid square brackets like Apple Marketing (TM) commands.

The Apple 2 managed to infiltrate every fucking school across the continent so anyone who was in elementary school from 1979 to 1986 was exposed to this machine.  It was slow, it was underpowered, it had shitty graphics and even shittier sound, but the eggheads at school seemed to love it.  The BBS fucktards loved it even more.  Fat, bearded "hobbyists" who lived in their parents basement and made a career out of modding the fuck out of this 8-bit piece of shit loved it the most.

Fast forward to the 90's.  Steve Fuckhead Jobs had run the company into the ground, and was thrown out on his ass.  The people who took over suddenly realised "Shit, the 5 people who buy Apple's overpriced shit can't fund any proper R&D."  So they pumped out the same garbage for 10 years straight...shitty PowerPC (who the fuck used this shitty balls-less CPU except for Apple) computers running a god-damned legacy CO-OPERATIVE MULTITASKING knuckle-dragging throwback of an operating system.  I cannot underscore this enough:  in the 90's even Microsoft pulled themselves into the 1960's and made Windows pre-emptively multitask.  BUT NOT APPLE.  Oh fuck no, their crappy operating system still operated on principles learned and discarded 30 years before.

Fast forward again to the end of the 90's.  Apple is fucked.  PROPER fucked.  For some reason the foaming-at-the-mouth fanatics who run the empty corpse of a company think that the great Steve Jobs is the man for the job to fix things...so they re-hire the fucker (who has since made a living funding CGI masturbation fests).

And this is where Microsoft fucked us all.  Apple was TANKING.  Even with Jobbin Hood they still needed money, and fast.  Bill Fucking Gates, of course, was busy trying to prove to the government that he wasn't an evil monopoly hell-bent on destroying the world...so, GATES SAVED APPLE.  He donated a shitload of cash to float that worthless god damn company.  

So now we have to put up with smarmy fucking Starbucks drinking iShitMyself iPod iPad iMac using retards who all think they are smarter than everyone else.  Every time you see a fucking commercial for the iPod with dancing silhouettes of black people, thank Bill Gates.  Every time some shithead tells you (all to the tune of some warped sounding piano that sounds like it was played on an 8-track left out in the sun) "It's all about the apps,"  THANK BILL GATES. 

Forget Windows, forget MS-DOG, forget every fucking thing that god damned over-priviledged nerd has done to computing.  The SOLE CRIME that this asshole needs to be strung up for is the bailing out of Apple.  Thanks to this small act, Apple has been able to dictate:  1) what codecs are "kosher" (MP3, fucktime, the abortion known as AAC and ALAC)  2)  The gold standard of "what a phone should do"  (even though just about EVERYONE does it better) and 3) what computers should act like.

You FUCKING idiots with your stupid iMacs act all fucking smug, pretending that Steve Jobs single handedly invented the GUI and multitasking.  Do you fucking morons even realize you are using NeXTStep warmed over, with a butt-ugly graphic-designer-designed interface?  Why are we suddenly pretending that Objective-C,  the "Spectravision" of programming languages, is suddenly significant?  Fuck you, and kindly shove that oversized iphone TOY up your stupid asses.

In the end, we can all thank BILL FUCKING GATES for inflicting a decade of smarmy Apple bullshit on us.  Forget Vista and Windows 7...Gates' only accomplishment was re-animating the corpse of something that should have stayed dead. The iPhuckingPhone has done little but bring back the "Shareware Concept" with it's stupid application store.  Where else can you go to pay $20 for a worthless shitpile that tracks the progress of Santa Clause or "makes a machine gun sound" when you point the stupid phone at people?

Fortunately, Shithead Jobs has overstepped himself.  The Always iPad is destined for failure and not even the most foaming-at-the-mouth fanboy is going to be able to change this.  No one wants a mono-tasking over-sized iPhone that is so filled with DRM technology it is giving the corpse of Jack Valenti an erection.  Let's all hope that the apple CULT has once again gone too far...and this time Gates won't be there with a cheque book to save their worthless asses.